When I was younger I used to believe that underneath all disagreement lay misunderstanding, and eventual agreement. That if we dug down deep enough through the layers of beliefs and perceptions and fears and desires, we’d reach a bedrock of truth on which we could all stand. We’d find common ground, as they say.

Now I’m not so sure.

It turns out that there’s a big problem around perception. It’s hard to argue about colors with someone who only sees grays. We all have different perception based on our senses and our beliefs. What we perceive is in part through our six senses. But it’s also colored by our beliefs. Our mind very effectively filters what we perceive. So when people don’t perceive the same things, and they’re not willing to concede that just because they don’t perceive it doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist, then it’s hard to get past that block towards a deeper truth. And this is coming from someone who’s actually color blind.

So of course this swings back to beliefs. And beliefs, at least in theory, can be changed. But it can only happen when there’s willingness.

And willingness is something that has to come from inside.

So in the end, if there’s no willingness, then there’s no point arguing, because it’s not going to change anything.